Melanie Toye Uplifts

Image by Marta Kulesza from Pixabay When I was working towards making my dream a reality to become a writer, I would tell myself almost daily, that I can’t fail if I don’t give up.  There were many times when i questioned all the hours I spent writing, all the work I was doing, if I would ever be able to work for myself solely as a writer.  It’s take persistence, sometimes it takes years/ decades to achieve your goal. So you need a phrase that is like a mantra that you keep telling yourself in the times where it’s easier to give up. But remember if you give up then you will never know the potential and the success you could have had and also you will be back at step one thinking about what to do and where to go from here.  Is it easier to give up? Absolutely. It’s hard work achieving your goals when your friends are at the beach relaxing. This doesn’t mean you can’t carve out some relaxation while you are achieving your goals towards your dream. You just can’t take too l...

Image by Vinzent Weinbeer from Pixabay When you have been through something traumatic in life, we tend to push it down and not talk about it.  It’s a release when we can talk to someone about it. It actually frees us even more. This person to talk to could be a professional, someone you trust or someone you know who’s being through a similar journey as you.  Talking about your experience makes you realise how free you are and how much you have grown. Sometimes when we are experiencing behaviour from someone else, it isn’t until we take off the rose coloured glasses that we realise, wow, how did I even put up with that person’s behaviour.  The most important thing to know is, you don’t have to put up with someone’s bad behaviour towards you. You can move on! And the best way to do that is to find support from others to help you on your journey to healing yourself.  Sometimes we feel it’s best we don’t open the darkness that we have had to overcome or are overcoming. ...

  Image by Åsa K from Pixabay So I was a pretty successful writer 7 years ago and then I burnt out from most areas of life and I stopped. I had been writing for years and then took a break. Burn out was real and ugly and when people asked if I would ever write again, I just said maybe in time. But it seemed so far away and I couldn’t really get past it. It just seemed like I was smashed and probably wouldn’t write again.  A few years ago, I even took down my ebooks and paperback from the online stores such as Amazon and Barnes and Noble etc. It was sad. Years of work. Just gone with a hit of a button. No history. I wiped my dream chaser blog. I even deleted my Facebook fan page. The only memory of my writing online was on my LinkedIn profile, follow me at  https://www.linkedin.com/in/melanie-toye-a3267644?utm_source=share&utm_campaign=share_via&utm_content=profile&utm_medium=ios_app . I used to do sixty hours a week writing, bringing up my young children and ...

Image by Nanne Tiggelman from Pixabay It’s hard, you could be in a toxic situation, whether it’s in a relationship or at work or something else.  It’s hard to know sometimes if it’s toxic or just challenging. But once you know, your rose-coloured glasses come off and you decide how you will proceed, whether you leave the situation or person, or you stay but set some clear boundaries. Maybe once you work it out, it’s not as toxic as you thought and that you do have freedoms that you can enjoy the most out of. I will say upfront, as you work through the thoughts of working out it if it’s toxic or just challenging, your emotions are going to get sticky. It’s up to you to feel the emotions, acknowledge them but then move on. You don’t want to get stuck in a feeling and think it is toxic and then just stay there. You have to do a full circle and work out the whole situation and then release your emotions. Because only once you work out your full situation, then you can determine your n...

Image by Michaela 💗 from Pixabay No matter what age you are, now is the most important time to believe in yourself. If you believe in yourself, the right doors will open for you. Opportunities will come knocking at your door. But you have to believe in yourself.  It’s very easy to be confident doing something you are good at. Now try something new for the first time, that confidence dwindles very quickly. Why? Because you don’t know where to start or how to deliver the outcome because you have never been shown and it’s something you have never done before.  Relax. You will learn how to do it if you really want it. And then it just takes practice. Sometimes every year of doing something on a regular basis you will see improvement. That’s why people have New Year Resolutions because in a year if you focus and stay on track with your goal and the most important part, you do it often then you will improve. There is no doubt. You can only get better. Some people work on their cra...

  Image by congerdesign from Pixabay Sometimes we just need a break. A day off to ourselves. A time to either do literally nothing and just brainstorm where we want our life to be and the steps to make it happen, as well timeframes to sit against those steps.  Or we just do what makes us happy.  Or both.  Sometimes, we just wake up or we go to bed stressed and wake up even more stressed. So giving yourself that day to just be with yourself will hopefully help. If you are stressed, writing down absolutely everything that is niggling at you right now is a great technique to help you get it on paper and out of your thoughts. You can even write down the thoughts associated with the situation you are facing.  Other ways to release stress is to pump up in the fitness arena. It doesn’t have to be going to a gym to do weights, it can literally be just a walk. Listen to music and let your thoughts be. Sometimes when we are outside exercising our brain feels clearer and ...

Image by Duckleap Free Resources from Pixabay It’s really important to do more of what gives you joy and/or peace inwardly.  But first, how do you know what works?  If you feel good after doing something, do that more often. If you feel anxious or your gut feels like something is wrong or your stomach feels tangled, try to do less of this. Although, if it’s nervous excited that isn’t necessarily a bad thing. Just something you may need more practice on. And you may feel this way, when you are doing something big that you wouldn’t normally do, like a performance, a test or interview. It can range far and wide.  What are some ideas that could fill your cup: Spend time with people you like It could be spending time with family and/or loved ones. Spending time with people you like and can be yourself around, instantly eases your mind and relaxes your body. It’s a wholesome experience. Instead of worrying, am I being accepted by this person? Is what I am saying what they are ...

Image by KCADRC from Pixabay When you are young, you have big dreams. Fun dreams.  And then you start the workforce and your dreams are still there but in the sidelines. You not-realising unconsciously decide to stop focusing on your efforts and you stop dreaming your big dreams. Because work is all-consuming. Working for money is all-consuming. And what you will do with that money, like buy a house for example becomes your next goal. And there is nothing wrong with this… except you then go through life and at some points think, whatever happened to my big dreams?  And the feelings of feeling like you no longer have the confidence, the skill set or the ideal age to go and chase your dreams, so you push them aside and you let life’s chaos take over.  And then a few years later, the feelings and thoughts about your once big dreams come back.  This is me telling you: No matter how old you are or what your financial status is, you have one life to do everything you ever...

Image by Joshua Woroniecki from Pixabay Sometimes, we can’t help being alone. Circumstances happen and we find ourselves alone and sometimes it’s quite frequent we are alone.  Alone time is fine and great sometimes. Although, when we are alone we tend to stay at home. Pot around and do what we feel like doing. And that is fine!  But sometimes, it’s too much and too long.  I suggest and hope you try this, is go out and explore a space. Either a place that you have been too before, because you know this place it will give you confidence to keep getting out and exploring. Or you could visit a new place and feel uplifted to explore a new space.  Whichever it is, go exploring! I have recently started a travel blog, so you can get inspired by my exploring adventures here:  https://melanietoyetravels.blogspot.com/?m=1 Have fun exploring! Aim for at least going out and exploring once a week. The natural good feeling vibe you will receive will be worth it. #exploring #u...

  Image sourced via:Image by goodinteractive from Pixabay   It’s ok to feel lonely, this comes hard and fast and sometimes it triples over the holiday season.  When you are feeling overwhelmed and upset because you feel lonely. There are ways so many ways to pull yourself back up and feel like you again. You could be lonely or you could be a success  Think of how you could be a success in your own life. Think how your day to day would look like? What would you be doing? Would you be smiling?  What about if instead of feeling lonely you went and did something?  It could be anything! Go for a walk. Go do something special for yourself- like get a massage or some kind of pampering and self-care. Stop the crying and the sad thoughts and instead wipe those tears and just take a deep breath.  Get up from where you are and get out of that room! Sometimes, just changing rooms can help lift your spirit back up. Have you tried gardening?  Gardening gets yo...

Hi and welcome to my uplifting blog! I feel like some days can be quite challenging, I also find that sometimes, our own voice is the only voice that can be positive in the day. So I decided, that if you are reading this, that maybe you just want to feel a little bit of uplifting.  Follow me on Facebook to see a range of blogs and blog posts on a range of topics, but also to keep up to date on this blog.