Melanie Toye Uplifts

Image by Nanne Tiggelman from Pixabay It’s hard, you could be in a toxic situation, whether it’s in a relationship or at work or something else.  It’s hard to know sometimes if it’s toxic or just challenging. But once you know, your rose-coloured glasses come off and you decide how you will proceed, whether you leave the situation or person, or you stay but set some clear boundaries. Maybe once you work it out, it’s not as toxic as you thought and that you do have freedoms that you can enjoy the most out of. I will say upfront, as you work through the thoughts of working out it if it’s toxic or just challenging, your emotions are going to get sticky. It’s up to you to feel the emotions, acknowledge them but then move on. You don’t want to get stuck in a feeling and think it is toxic and then just stay there. You have to do a full circle and work out the whole situation and then release your emotions. Because only once you work out your full situation, then you can determine your n...

Image by HANSUAN FABREGAS from Pixabay  It’s interesting how anger works…. If you think about it there are generally two other emotions going on around the same time and then it builds up to anger and it will burst through any self-composed person in different ways.  Interestingly, after I am angry I think about how did I feel leading up to the anger or what was the anger masking?  Sometimes it’s anxiety, sometimes it’s stress, sometimes it’s  grief. And you don’t have to lose someone to grieve. Grieving can happen in all different ways such as grieving a change of lifestyle or grieving an end of a friendship or just grieving what you may have lost in the past.  So it’s important to look at why you got angry? But it’s ok to have felt angry as well. As long as it is controlled and there is no danger to anyone or yourself, anger is a valid and normal emotion.  Obviously, no one wants to be angry for too long. People want to feel good and that’s why people te...

Image by Michaela 💗 from Pixabay No matter what age you are, now is the most important time to believe in yourself. If you believe in yourself, the right doors will open for you. Opportunities will come knocking at your door. But you have to believe in yourself.  It’s very easy to be confident doing something you are good at. Now try something new for the first time, that confidence dwindles very quickly. Why? Because you don’t know where to start or how to deliver the outcome because you have never been shown and it’s something you have never done before.  Relax. You will learn how to do it if you really want it. And then it just takes practice. Sometimes every year of doing something on a regular basis you will see improvement. That’s why people have New Year Resolutions because in a year if you focus and stay on track with your goal and the most important part, you do it often then you will improve. There is no doubt. You can only get better. Some people work on their cra...

Image by Daniel Reche from Pixabay It’s ok to be anxious, even sometimes you might just get anxious at a certain situation you may have to deal with it. The most important thing to remember when you feel anxious is be gentle on yourself, talk to your inner mind and talk through the situation. Congratulate yourself when the situation is over. Just because you felt anxious doesn’t mean you have to feel like you failed a situation. If you still went through it then congratulate yourself that you did something and you were anxious and you still did it anyway.  This can relate to a fear of heights or travelling on an airplane. If you start to feel anxious about a possibly dangerous situation and your gut (stomach) is sending you a warning, this is when you need to listen to it and find another way. Do you see the difference?  One is safe, like climbing a tall mountain in a safe way even though you may be afraid of heights and the other is you might be walking straight into a dange...